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“I know I’ve got to get out of this job one day, but I’m so busy right now, I don’t even have time to think about it!”
These words from a recent client speak to the heart of a major obstacle for many people when it comes to any lifestyle change, including transitioning after divorce or the loss of a relationship. Our busyness can obscure our ability to make significant decisions for ourselves. The irony is that being super-busy can be easier than allowing ourselves to become still and quiet and deal with difficult decisions or painful situations…but this avoidance can cost us genuine happiness and contentment.
Do you have time to discover what changes would be good for you? If you know the changes you want to make, do you allow yourself the time and mental space for them to develop?
As you probably know, there’s a big difference between having an inkling that things need to change and actually taking steps to make changes happen. There are many reasons we resist making changes. One of the big ones is actually an unwillingness to give ourselves the time and space to be alone and let our intuition guide us.
Have you ever had a great idea come to you while you’re taking a shower, walking your dog, or just waking up in the morning? These are times when the busyness of our daily lives and our thinking minds often get a brief respite, allowing our intuition to come to the surface. Have you also noticed that if you try for these moments of insight, they’re less likely to come? This is why it’s so important to allow ourselves quiet time alone each day, not to be used for planning or strategizing, but to just be with ourselves in the present as much as possible and allow things to arise as they will. (And science bears this out: scientists studying brain imagery believe contemplative or creative time allows the brain to synchronize its logical left side with its intuitive right side, facilitating our ability to think creatively).
Yes, I realize this is hard! Our culture tells us to remain busy all the time. If we stay busy, we can feel productive – but who is this productivity really benefiting? I would submit that quiet time alone is radical and countercultural – after all, we might just gain some insight that leads us to do something outside the norm (like singing in the street, eating slow lunches, vocalizing our political opinions, or taking a vacation to Timbuktu).
Starting now, I challenge you to be radical by taking intuitive time for yourself every day (without trying too hard to be radical or intuitive). Excellent ways to do this include walking in nature, sitting meditation (take lessons or a class to learn how – I can teach you), drawing or painting, listening to inspiring music, and petting or walking your furry friend (as long as it is in a meditative, present-moment spirit, rather than “stewing/thinking about all the things I have to do/ruminating about who said what” mode). I’ve posted some other ideas at my 3-Minute Vacations and ½ Hour Vacations pages.
